Without You
by charliespike18
Summary: Eddi after Luc vanishes. Will be Muti-part.
1. Chapter 1

**My first fic so please be nice.**

**Chapter 1**

Eddi was on auto-pilot as she entered the hospital. It was when she neared AAU that it really hit her. Luc was gone.

"Nurse McKee, there's a meeting in Mr Hanssen's office. Ten minutes," Sasha Levy instructed as she sat down, sighing. "Why?" It was a stupid question. It would be about Luc decision not to accept the contract, despite what he had told her on the roof she knew he hadn't or hid stupid face would be standing next to her.

Ten minutes later and the staff of AAU were sitting or standing in Henrik Hanssen's office. "I am sure some of you may be aware but Dr. Luc Hemingway has left our staffing team." Hanssen drawled. "This did not come as a shock to me but we, as of yet, have not found a suitable replacement. We will hope to do this quickly and efficiently, thank you for your time. Now leave and get on with your jobs." Eddi walked despondently from the office, her thoughts dragging her down. "Eddi, Eddi…?" Sasha's voice asked "Are you O.K?" He continued. She whipped around, shocking Sasha slightly. "What do you think?" She left the question hanging in the air. Before he could reply Eddi barged past him and in to the room marked "Ladies".

Once in the loo's she let the long awaited tears streak across her cheeks_. How could he leave? After saying he would stay?_ Her head was a mess, did Luc care? From what he had just done, most probably not. Did she care about him? Her heart was screaming _Yes_, but the more rational side of her was telling her to forget what had happened between them. None of her was saying she didn't care, because the truth was, Eddi McKee was in love with Luc Hemingway.

Suddenly she felt very sick. Eddi spun round, and promptly vomited violently in to one of the toilets. As she was wiping the sick of her mouth Chrissie entered the loo. "My god Eddi, are you alright?" Chrissie whined. Uggg, all she needed, Chrissie pestering her to know if she was fine. Eddi dragged herself up and over to sink. She looked a state; mascara smudged, eyes red raw and puffy from crying, the list went on. "Just something bad I ate last night." She smiled weakly at her colleague. It was a lie, Eddi hadn't actually eaten anything the previous night but it was all she could think of quickly. "O.K, just take it easy for the rest of the day." Chrissie replied, unconvincingly. Eddi exited the loo and went over to see her first patient of the day.

Sasha was currently on his break, he had taken the opportunity to have a cup of coffee in the currently unoccupied staff room. He had just taken the first sip of the hot liquid when his girlfriend walked in. "Sash, I'm worried about Eddi?" He looked up and stared at Chrissie. "Why, you still don't think she and Luc were together?" Chrissie shook her head and sat next the Sasha. "I found her in the loo, she had just been vomiting. She looked really pale and ill." Sasha's eyebrows went up. "Did you ask her what was wrong? You're probably just over reacting." "Well, she said it was just something she ate, I hope she's O.K," Chrissie said concern evident in her voice.

That night Eddi sat in her bathroom, crying. She couldn't look at it again. It was only a word, but it would change her whole life. Eddi McKee was pregnant.


	2. Chapter 2

**3 Months later**

Eddi walked in to AAU. The morning sickness wasn't that bad and she wasn't showing very much. It had dawned on her that she would have to tell someone eventually. Eventually, not yet. She had decided that she would tell Sasha first. Well it was him or Henrik Hanssen. They had been told the previous day that there would be a meeting in the staff room at nine so she made her way there.

Sasha Levy opened the staff room door to find every member of staff working that day in there. It must be a very important announcement. Hanssen appeared 5 minutes later. "It nice to see you could all make it." He articulated, "Today I will be introducing a new member of staff…" "Finnally a replacement for Luc," Jac exclaimed. "If I could continue Miss Naylor." Hanssen said glancing sternly in Jac's direction. "A new member of staff for some of you, not all." He stated, gathering mutters from some of the staff. "I would like you all to welcome Dr. Luc Hemingway." Sasha was shocked to say the least. Luc entered the room, Sasha watched him as he stood next Hanssen. Eddi looked very angry. Her eyes were locked with Luc's; to Sasha it looked as if they were having an argument through eye contact.

Abruptly Eddi stood and strode out of the room, with Luc closely following. _Keep walking, keep walking, get away from him . _Eddi didn't want to be near him. Luc reached forward and grabbed her arm, spinning her round to face him. "Eddi…" He was interrupted by a short, sharp slap round the face. Sasha had exited the staff room as was currently watching the scene from the end of the corridor; he decided to act before it got any more violent and he briskly walked down the passageway towards Eddi and Luc. "What the hell do you want?" She shouted, trying to turn. Luc still had her wrist and he had a strong grip. She was aware that someone was standing behind her. "Luc please let Eddi go. Hanssen want to see you both in his office now." Sasha declared. He let go of Eddi's wrist and turned, walking off in the direction of Hanssen's office.

"Miss McKee, Mr Hemingway, do you think that was appropriate way to behave. You stormed out of an important meeting." He pronounced, glaring at Eddi from behind his desk. "And Mr Hemingway, you left a meeting which was meant to be you introduction to the new staff. Not a very good start to your first day back. Now no more arguments. " He signalled for them to leave. Outside Hanssen's office Luc stopped and turned to face Eddi. "Please Eddi…." But she just walked away.

"Luc, nice to have you back." Chrissie announced, "Do you know were Nurse McKee is?" Luc was surprised by the question. "She should've been here before me." Luc replied as Chrissie sighed. "Do you know where she might be?" "The roof, most probably." Luc stated, glancing down at some paperwork. Chrissie beckoned Sasha over and whispered something in his ear. When Chrissie had finished talking he walked off. "I'll go see if she's alright," Luc said earning a stern glance from Chrissie. "Luc, you're staying put. That's where Sasha is going."

Eddi loved it up here; it was her refuge from all the hustle and bustle of the hospital. It also happened to have memories of Luc, memories she wanted to keep, good memories of him. "Eddi," She heard Sasha's voice before she saw him. He climbed on to the roof and sat next to her. "Are you O.K? What happened earlier?" She liked Sasha; he was a very good friend. "Earlier I got a little angry….." She paused. "How can he do this Sash? How? It's not fair." Eddi put her head it to her hand as tears threatened to make an appearance. "Were you with Luc before he left?" Eddi nodded her head. "Are you scared?" Again she nodded her head. "Why?" It was a simple question. "Is it Luc? Did he hurt you?" Eddi turned her head quickly. "No. He wouldn't hurt me physically, ever. Mentally, thought, I don't think he can put through much more. Did you know he told me he was staying?" Eddi said, looking to the other side of the roof. "I'm sorry…." "I don't need your pity. God, I just need to tell someone." She blew out her cheeks and closed her eyes. "I'm pregnant." Her eyes remained tight shut. "Oh, Eddi." He turned and pulled her in to a hug. Then the tears finally came, cascading down her cheeks.

Luc was on his break and talking to Michael. "What has changed since I left?" he asked, pouring himself a coffee. "Mo has given birth to a baby girl called Scarlett, Dan and Simon left, plus we had as new Doctor and a Nurse start. The Doctor is called Cameron Fisher, the Nurse is Chloe Radford." Michael declared taking a deep breath. Luc nodded, "And Eddi? How is she?" "Why are you interested in Eddi? No… you didn't? Did you?" Luc looked at his colleague strangely. "What did I do?" He replied as Michael shook his head. "Did you sleep together?" Michael said, stressing every letter. "I'm not stupid and what's it to you?" Michael started to laugh, then Mo and Johnny walked in and Michael stood up. As he passed Luc he said "You did, didn't you Dr. Hemingway?" And patted Luc on the shoulder. After that Luc made a swift exit. "What the hell was that about?" Mo Exclaimed.

Chrissie walked over to the desk in AAU as Luc did too. "Where's Sasha?" Chrissie was surprised he hadn't asked about Eddi. "Still on the roof I guess." Luc looked at her like she was an idiot. "Well, go check on them. We need them down here." He answered. Chrissie followed Luc's instructions and went up to the roof.

As she climbed the last step she heard her boyfriend and Eddi talking. "It's going to be hard Eddi, but you'll do it," They were standing, leaning on the metal bar that stopped people falling of the building. "Hey, Sash.." Eddi and Sasha whipped around at her words. "We need you down stairs." They followed her down to AAU. "Finally, we're actually all here." Luc said, sounding relived. "Now were all 'finally here' let's have a party" Eddi exclaimed with mock enthusiasm. Luc scowled at her. "Now, Nurse McKee, go see Mr Carpenter. Bed 3." He instructed. She walked off, Luc then went to see his patient. "What were you talking about that could take a whole hour?" "Something very important Chrissie."

Two hours later and Eddi was on her Lunch break when Luc, who was on his too, entered the staffroom. They sat, awkwardly, for 5 minutes. "Look, Dr. Hemingway, please would you leave my sight." She knew it sounded very harsh but she really needed to be alone. "You know what Nurse McKee? I'm not going to." "For god's sake, you managed to do it just fine 3 months ago." She retorted. "That was different…" "Why the hell was that different?" Eddi shouted, standing up. "Stop shouting. It just was. O.K?" He answered "I can do what I want." She was getting really angry at him. "You don't understand Eddi," Luc said, anger rising as he stood too. "Don't understand! You left! Chickened out of a commitment. No, Luc, you don't understand what you did. You said you were going to stay." "Well at least I came back!" "After 3 months!" She cried, somehow they had come closer to each other, their heads only 30cm apart. "Well, I didn't think you'd care." "Are you an idiot? Wait, don't answer that. Of course you are. Of course I care" "Well, I don't." They were only a matter of Cm's apart, getting slowly closer and closer. "Johnny can you get Mr Davenports blo…." Mo stopped speaking. "Are we interrupting something?" Johnny queried. Luc turned and walked out. Eddi looked down and blew out her cheeks, closing her eyes. "Why are you standing in the door of the staff room?" Elliott's voice asked as he too appeared in the doorway, along with Jac and Ollie. Eddi ran out after Luc, pushing past her colleagues in the doorway. "Did I miss something?" Elliot asked as the mass flooded into the staffroom "Probably." Jac quipped. Johnny leaned over to Mo. "I bet you ten quid they were sleeping together before he left." Mo smiled. "I think you might be right."

5 minutes later Serena pushed the staff room door open. "Can anybody tell me why Dr. Hemingway, followed by Nurse McKee just ran across my ward?" She inquired. "They're probably going to finish their argument. We sort of interrupted them when we came in here." Mo replied, gestured to herself and Johnny. "They were shouting so loud you could hear it outside the filliping door." Mo continued. "I thought they were going to kiss. Well that's my opinion." Johnny added as Serena, looked extremely flustered and tired left the room.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks to Emmel1118, Maria747 and BellatrixKelly98 for Reviewing. **

**1 Month Later**

They hadn't had a propped conversation since the argument in the staff room. "Why did you do that? I instructed you to see Mr Carstairs and only Mr Carstairs!" Luc shouted. Sasha and Chrissie looked at the arguing pair, they had argued over some really trivial things recently. "Oh, I didn't know I had to cross reference everything with you first. It's something you don't do." Eddi spat. "What do you mean?" "Well, it not like you checked if I was alright when you left. This is no different, so why should I?" Some way or another there augments always ended up here, with one of them mentioning the prolonged period of time Luc had spent away from Holby. "That is completely different." "For god's sake, it is not." She shouted, as they continued to look as if they would kill each other if they had the chance.

Ric had heard Eddi shouting from the other end of the corridor. He then walked over. "Please, Dr. Hemingway, Nurse McKee, stop arguing, it is upsetting some of the patients. I would like to see you in my office at the end of your shifts." Eddi glared across at Luc. "You heard Ric, stop please. Eddi bed 5, Lottie Brady, we think she might have appendicitis." Chrissie asked. Eddi snatched the file on Miss Brady and walked off.

Ric sat in his office. Sitting across from him were two people who had a very odd relationship. "I'm sure Sasha or Chrissie have told you that this arguing has to stop. What ever happened between you should not affect you in the workplace, both of you need to act more professional. If you wouldn't mind me asking what exactly is making you argue so often?" Ric inquired. Luc glanced over to Eddi who had her head in her hands. "I'm sorry." Eddi's head snapped up. "Pardon, I didn't ask you to apologise." Ric responded. Luc and Eddi both sat, in complete silence, taking no notice of an ever inpatient Ric. After 5 minutes of this Ric got up and left to see if Sasha or Chrissie might be able to make sense of the situation.

"Dr. Levy?" Ric asked nearing the desk on AAU, "I need your help." Sasha's eyebrows shot up. "What's the matter Mr Griffin?" He said walking round the desk. "Currently I have two people occupying my office. They're unwilling to speak to one another, and it seems, to get out of my office." Ric declared, gesturing in the vague direction of his office. "What did you do?" "I didn't do anything. He just apologised." "He did what!" Sasha shouted as Jac strolled up to them. "Whoa, Sash, why are you shouting? Who did what?" She asked.

Back in Ric's office they still hadn't said a word. Eddi stood and walked over to the window. "Luc?" He didn't reply. "LUC!" She cried, turning away from the window. "That happens to be my name. Yes, what do you want?" He responded. Eddi turned to face him, continuing to lean on the window frame. "I just want things t…." Eddi never finished her sentence. Serena didn't notice them to start with, "What the hell are you two doing in my office?" Both Eddi and Luc had forgotten that Ric shared the room. While Eddi and Serena stared at each other he got up and strode out of the office. This time Eddi didn't follow him.

Her shift had ended 10 minutes before but she still had left. Luc's had ended two hours previous to most of the hospital staff's relief. She was currently walking to Darwin, to talk to Jac about a patient. It was as she rounded the corner she heard Cameron, Tara and Mo talking. They were always gossiping about the same thing and had been for a month. She was getting angry at everybody, at Luc and even at herself, but mainly at everybody else. "Will you shut up and get on with your jobs! You may be surprised that you all chatting about my personal life is slightly angering! Who cares if I slept with Luc? What is it to you anyway?" She shouted making the recipients of her anger to step back slightly. Mo was the first one to recover and ambled off over to Johnny. "Here you go," She said handing him a 10 pound note.

Eddi's blue trainers splashed through yet another puddle; it had rained a lot recently. Well it was November. She delved into her pocket and retrieved her key. Eddi then trust it into the lock and opened the black door. It was the first thing she noticed. He was standing there. He was actually standing there. Why the hell was he actually standing there? "I've always had the key," he didn't really know how apt what he had said was. Not only did he have the key to her house, but he would always possess the key to her heart.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks if you reviewed x**

**The Next Morning**

When she woke up he was gone. She hadn't really expected him to stay, though that didn't mean she wasn't disappointed.Eddi didn't really know how she'd managed to get herself into this situation, she wasn't meant to let him back in. Eddi knew that if she found herself in the same circumstance again she would do exactly the same. She wouldn't change it, how could she. Yes she regretted that she's let him back in, but she could never regret sleeping with him. Because if she was honest it was the best thing she could do. Ever.

She was dreading work. The awkward silences, the argument, would he even acknowledge that it had happened? She didn't see him when she first arrived, and was greeted by Sasha. "Hey Eddi, you look tired? Bad night?" She had had the best night for a long time, how much sleep she'd actually got wasn't very much, but she doubted Sasha wanted to know about that. In the end she just shrugged. They made their way up to AAU. Eddi and Luc didn't talk, not a single word from either of them. "Do you think something happened?" Chrissie asked 2 hours later. "Well not talking is better than arguing, right?" Sasha replied not really sounding convinced.

Sasha was on his break. It was also a break from the murderous glances Eddi and Luc kept throwing each other instead of having heated arguments. The previous day when he had arrived at Ric's office to see what insults Eddi and Luc were trading, he was shocked to see a bewildered Serena sitting at her desk. Eddi had been sitting in a crumpled heap on the ground and Luc was no were to be scene. He was torn from trying to work out what had actually occurred in Ric and Serena's office by Jac, Elliot, Cameron and Luc entering the Staff room. "Luc, Eddi said you were to give Mr Ferguson his prescription. It's on the table under the patient folder." Sasha said, gesturing behind the sofa he was currently occupying. Luc strolled over the table and picked up the large yellow folder and the two small green and white slips of paper. He read the first one and put in down, his attention now focused on the other slip. Luc flipped it over and scanned the word written on the paper. He dropped it like it was 100 degrees and ambled out, muttering "I'm going on my break now." Barely above a whisper. Jac was interested in what made Luc run out like that, she picked the prescription up. There was nothing written on the side of the paper she was looking at, she turned it over. "Oh my god!" She exclaimed. Sasha stood up and walked over Jac, snatching the piece of paper out of her hand. There were eight words written on this side of the prescription. 'I'm so sorry Luc. I'm Four months Pregnant' it was written in Eddi's handwriting, but it was shaky. Well, Sasha didn't blame her.

Luc climbed the final few step to the roof. His mind was all over the place. He was going to be a dad, now that was a scary thought. Eddi was lying on the concrete block, facing away from Luc. He made his way over to her. He then realised she was asleep. Luc layed down next to her, cradling her. "I am so sorry," He whispered in to her neck.

Eddi was being violently shaken, "Hey, wake up sleepyhead," She head Sasha's voice say before she sat up. Eddi watched Luc exit the roof. "What was he doing here?" Eddi asked, rubbing her eye sleepily. "Did you not think he would find it? He was sleeping next to you when I got here." "Oh god. Sash why didn't he stay. We need to talk about the baby. We need to talk about last night." She cried "Last night?" Sasha queried. Eddi closed her eyes. "Last night I and Luc slept together." He words were met by a sharp intake of breath from Sasha. Eddi was suddenly aware of a shooting pain in her abdomen. Crying put in pain her hand flew to her stomach. "Eddi what's wrong?" "The baby Sash, help the baby," She sobbed.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks to all that reviewed. **

**Down In AAU**

Sasha carried Eddi over to the bed as Michael came over. "Whoa, Eddi, what's wrong?" He asked, looking her up and down. "She's complaining of pain in her abdomen," Sasha replied as Eddi whimpered again. She glared up at Sasha, "He ended his shift when he left on the roof," Sasha answer after realising why Eddi had been glaring at him. "For god's sake he like two minutes away, please Sash." She gasped in pain again.

Sasha exited the side room Eddi had been placed in and ambled over to the lift. In the lift he met Jac. "Could you do me a massive favour?" He inquired. "What?" Jac replied, sounding sceptical. "As your leaving could you drop in on Luc and tell him that Eddi might be losing the baby, she wants him Jac? Please?" He begged. "My god…. Um O.K," Jac responded.

Luc was sat on the bed in his caravan when he was dragged from his important thought by someone rapping on the door. He jumped up and pulled the door open. He had expected Eddi, or maybe Sasha, but definitely not Jac Naylor. "Can we talk?" She didn't wait for a reply and barged past Luc into the caravan. "What do you want?" He asked, closing the door. "She might be losing the baby." It was simple and to the point. The atmosphere in the room suddenly got darker. Luc put his hand to his face. "Why are you telling me this," Jac glared at him, "I was under the impression that it was you child Eddi is carrying. Luc, you've got to understand, she needs you. You hurt her so much when you left, you took her heart and through in back in her face" She hissed. "What would you know about that then Jac?" Luc watched as Jac fought with herself. "You see Luc, this happened to me. I loved this man once. He was amazing, handsome, all of that. But he left, he gave me the opportunity to go with him but I didn't, I really wish I had. But what I'm trying to say, is it hurts, for long time… Do you love her?" Jac declared. She was very close to tears; she hadn't spoken of Joseph in such a long time. "I think, probably …..yes." He spluttered. "Luc, take my word for it. You don't know what you've got before it's gone." Jac whispered.

Luc took the seat next to the bed. He reached out and took her hand in his. "Hey, I'm sorry." He spoke softly. Eddi smiled. "I think you deserve to know why I left. You see I accepted the contract, I didn't lie, I had. Really. But then I got a phone call from my mum. My mum who I haven't seen in 10 years. Ellie was dying. My only sibling was close to the edge. They live in Australia, so that were I went." "For three months? She couldn't of been that close to death of she held out for 3 months Luc." Eddi interjected. "She didn't she died 4 days after I got out there, I had to wait to the end of the month or the funeral, but I came back. Hanssen wouldn't give me my job back. Said they didn't need me. So I got a job at St. James. I was a coward, I lived 3 streets away from you, but I waited, and waited, until Hanssen finally gave in and I got my job back. I and I am so sorry." They sat like that for 10 minutes, until she was asleep. "Sometimes it's easier not to say goodbye."

3 hours later Sasha was occupying Luc seat as he was getting both him and Sasha a well needed coffee. Michael bustled in as Eddi stirred. "Where's Hemingway?" He inquired. "Getting coffee, he'll be here in a minute," He replied turning to face Eddi. As Luc entered the lift his pager bleeped. 'We need you for surgery Luc. Be there 5 mins max.' _Well the coffee would just have to go to _waste. Luc thought as he put them in the bin.

That's why 15 minutes after Michael had waltzed in they were all still waiting for Luc. "O.K Michael he not coming, just say it." She stated, the anger rising again. "I'm so sorry Eddi, but you lost the baby."


	6. Chapter 6

**3 weeks later**

Eddi's miscarriage of her and Luc's son was the talk of the hospital for the following weeks. Not many people knew Luc was the father, so there were many rumours about who they thought the father had been. The main perpetrator of these rumours had been Dr. Cameron Fisher and Nurse Chloe Radford, they were both sitting in the staff room, along with Sasha, Ollie, Tara and Jac when Luc strolled in.

Luc and Eddi hadn't really sat down and talked about it, to be honest they hadn't talked about anything. "It bet she can't even remember who the father was, most probably some druggie. The baby most probably would have been disabled…." Cameron didn't get to finish his sentence. Luc hadn't been this angry in a long time. He grabbed him by the shoulders and crashed him against the wall, with tremendous force. Cameron's scrawny legs dangled from about 30cm above the ground. "Would you like to say that again Dr Fisher?" Luc spat, his blood boiling. Cameron flailed around desperately. "What I don't know what the hell you're going on about." He spluttered. "Care to say what you said about my son again, to my face this time." He hollered just as Eddi walked in, during the confrontation Sasha had gone to get Eddi. She walked over to him and placed a calming hand on the back of his head. "Shh Luc, calm down please." She whispered, stroking his hair. Luc swiftly let go of Cameron who fell to the floor in a heap.

Eddi walked out of the staffroom, Luc closely following, his hand clasped in hers. She led him to the on-call room and sat him down on the bed. "I am so sorry," Luc stated. Eddi didn't look at him, continuing to stare at the floor. "Sash told me what he said, thanks Luc, he deserved it." She said, smirking and looking up. "This is my fault…" "No, Luc it's mine, if I wasn't so stupid, we might still have a little boy," She choked, tears forming in her eyes. "No, Eddi if I hadn't been so scared, I would have been here from the begging. It could have been different." He said placing a hand on her cheek. "Jac gave me a little bit of advice, she told me to take her word for it, but you don't know what you've got till it's gone." Luc continued, the tears seeped from his eyes now. "Well, that's very good advice," Eddi proclaimed, tears now cascading down her face. Then they kissed, it was passionate, tender and meaning full. They broke away.

"Where the hell are Hemingway and McKee?" Michael asked an hour later. Chrissie was about to end her shift, and as they were nowhere to be seen he would be alone. Both he and Chrissie started looking. He found them ten minutes later, in the on-call room, on the bed asleep. Naked save the covers.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Sorry it's so short. Next one will be longer. **_

When she woke Eddi didn't know where she was, for a few seconds at least, it was then she remembered. Oh god, he was still there, lying behind her. She shuffled and in the processes woke him up. They dressed in silence; it was as they were leaving. "I am so sorry." She said.

"Hey," Michael Spence chirped as they walked across AAU, "Thank god you've come, as you'd both gone to um…. Yare, I had to cope with Jac Naylor for an hour and a half!" "I not that bad, what was keeping you then?" Jac said sauntering over to the trio. "No one going to tell me?... Well, I'm going back to Darwin. See you Spence." And with that she was gone.

**3 Weeks later. **

"Mitchell Martin, found drunk in a park, query liver failure." Sasha Levy stated as Luc and Eddi strolled over. "Is he unconscious?" Luc asked. As if to answer the question Mitch tried to stand, "Whoa, you're not going anywhere mate," Eddi muttered. Mr Martin was still struggling so Luc restrained him, pinning him down. The patient swung a fist at Luc, catching off guard and to the floor. Eddi rushed over to him as Martin clambered off the bed and staggered forward. Luc got up and walked, calmly over to him. "Please Mr Mart…." He didn't get any further; Martin had a scalpel gripped in his right hand. "Give that to me…" Luc started. "Don't come near me," Luc took another step, Martin drove the knife through the air. Luc waited for the inevitable stab of pain to jolt through his body, but it didn't come. Eddi had stepped in front of him and had been stabbed instead. Martin was nowhere to be seen. "Hey, Eddi stay with me ok." Luc breathed as Michael and Sasha ran over.

**That Night. **

"She'll be fine," Michael said softly, earning a glare from Luc. "I'm a doctor to, this is extremely serious. She might….." He took a deep breath. "She might not make it to tomorrow." Mo walked in and went to check Eddi stats. "I am so sorry to tell you this, well just after what happened a couple of months back, but she was pregnant. She lost the baby." As Mo finished her sentence. Eddi's machine started to ominously beep…

**Sorry to end it there. Probs update later today or tomorrow.x Charliexx **


	8. Chapter 8

**Sorry again that it took so longx**

_Luc's P.O.V_

I can remember that day with a clarity that only a few important memories have. I looked around, and saw the church. I didn't, and still don't, wear suits, but I was wearing one then, it was a special occasion. I strolled forward as Sasha came up the path next to me. "Luc, everything alright," he asked slightly out of breath. "I'm fine, just…. You know. Where's Chrissie?" I inquired as we entered the church. "She'll be here soon, don't you worry." Sasha replied, walking down the aisle. I sat on the front pew; Liam was occupying the space next to me. "You O.K? You've travelled quite far" Sasha asked Liam. "Well… I wouldn't miss this for anything." He replied, taking a deep breath.

Soon the church was full, of colleagues, friend, family, but there was still one person missing. I don't quite know why, but something Jac told me sprang into my head - _"Luc, take my word for it. You don't know what you've got before it's gone." _And she couldn't have been more right. I had watched Eddi loose two of our children, a little boy and the other one hadn't been alive long enough for us to know its gender, and then….. And then, oh god, Eddi had fallen asleep, to be with our babies. I don't cry for much, but this tipped me of a cliff I had been hanging on the edge of for a long time. I felt like I was in a hole, a pitch black hole, and there was no escaping, no getting out. It should have been me, Sasha says I'm stupid for thinking that, but the knife should have penetrated my skin. It should have killed me. Eddi McKee saved my life by sacrificing hers, for that I will be eternally grateful her, to the one person who showed me infinite love, like no one else before, or since has.

"Earth to earth, Ashes to ashes, Dust to dust," The vicar declared as her body was lowered into the grave, that bit I remember so well, it hurts so much, like hell. I'm writing this because Sasha told me I should, it would help me get over her. It been ten years and I haven't, and I don't think I will. After the funeral I went back to work at Holby, it was down, so down. Chrissie, Michael and Sasha, where all shocked and distraught by Eddi death, but they got over it. Chrissie and Sasha got married and in addition to Dan they have a son called Sebastian and a daughter called Eddi. Their daughter is like her name sake, strong and independent. All three of them know about Eddi, what happened.

I really wish I wasn't a coward, then maybe I wouldn't have run away in the first place, all those years ago, maybe I would have told her everything wanted to before she slipped away. Maybe we'd be married with two beautiful children. Maybe I would have been able to live my life without the feeling of loneliness, of seclusion and of utter incompleteness. I miss her so much. I don't have a heart, mine lies in the ground with Eddi, it will to the day I join her in death.

**The end, thank you for sticking with me the whole way through this. As usual, hope it's good, please review, it makes me happy, Charliexx**


End file.
